At my book signing yesterday, I met many loved ones of alcoholics. I could tell the ones who were still living with an alcoholic because I recognized the expression on their face that I’d worn for so long—that half-smile trying to deny the ache and agony simmering below the surface.

The alcoholic tends to take over—you find yourself defaulting to their needs, rearranging your schedule for theirs, contemplating their actions and your reactions. Stop. Resist the urge to put them first. Embrace the idea of you. The alcoholic is going to do whatever they want. They are making a decision to be an alcoholic. Please make the decision to take care of yourselves.

That means keeping up with your healthcare appointments, being active, eating healthy and staying connected. Now more than ever you need family and friends. Your social circle is a support system whether they know it or not. If the alcoholic is isolating, you’re probably craving society. Don’t deny yourself a life. Don’t put their needs before yours—the alcoholic certainly won’t do that for you.

By taking care of yourself, you’ll be a better spouse, partner, parent. But most of all you’ll be a better you. The main reason to take care of yourself is that you deserve it.

In 2024 commit to you!